星期二, 1月 31, 2006

大白兔糖

這幾天常吃大白兔糖..

味道不及從前.

但還是覺得很好吃.

小時候..還以為那張米紙是不能吃的糖紙..

大白兔糖...是少數我喜歡的國貨.

星期一, 1月 30, 2006

Sophie in wonderland

這三天假期在家, 合共睡了至少四十小時..真是頹廢..

更肯定自己真是很愛睡覺的..

小時候, 無憂無慮..我總是很快入睡

人大了.. 剛出來做事的時候我才真正明白失眠的痛苦..還幸.. 最近的我..每天都算睡得不錯的


前陣子,偶然在一個書展買了愛麗斯夢遊仙境的英文版”Alice in Wonderland”


外國人認為這本書是must read 的兒童讀物, 大學時, 記得看過一個智力測驗 / aptitude test, 其中一題就是問 你看過愛麗斯夢遊仙境嗎”? 可想而知, 這本著作在洋人社會實在家傳戶曉.


Alice
經常自言自語, 有點神化. 有時在office做事遇到難題時, 我也會不理旁人的目光, 進行一大串self-talk, 因為我的腦筋麻麻,需要兩個腦袋來process , 各位請見諒.


Chapter 1 : “for this curious child was very fond of pretending to be two people. “But it’s no use now,” thought poor
Alice, “to pretend to be two people! Why, there’s hardly enough of me left to make one respectable person!”


不記得是看哪一本哲學還是心理學的書, 引了書的內容講self 的問題.


Alice
初進rabbit hole , 因受外界環境影響, 又因喝了神奇的藥水和蛋糕, 常為體形煩惱, 竟也有幾份像現代都市女性的情況.


我今天才知Alice in Wonderland 是有續集的 ..”Through the looking glass”


沒有耐性..很快就翻結尾的部份 所以不知前文後理. 但當中精警的對白我很喜歡:


chapter IX : Queen Alice

……..

The Red Queen broke the silence by saying to the White Queen, `I invite you to Alice's dinner-party this afternoon.'

The White Queen smiled feebly, and said `And I invite YOU.'

`I didn't know I was to have a party at all,' said Alice; `but if there is to be one, I think _I_ ought to invite the guests.'

`We gave you the opportunity of doing it,' the Red Queen remarked: `but I daresay you've not had many lessons in manners yet?'

`Manners are not taught in lessons,' said Alice. `Lessons teach you to do sums, and things of that sort.'

`And you do Addition?' the White Queen asked. `What's one and one and one and one and one and one and one and one and one and one?'

`I don't know,' said Alice. `I lost count.'

`She can't do Addition,' the Red Queen interrupted. `Can you do Subtraction? Take nine from eight.'

`Nine from eight I can't, you know,' Alice replied very readily: `but -- '

`She can't do Subtraction,' said the White Queen. `Can you do Division? Divide a loaf by a knife -- what's the answer to that?'

`I suppose -- ' Alice was beginning, but the Red Queen answered for her. `Bread-and-butter, of course. Try another Subtraction sum. Take a bone from a dog: what remains?'

Alice considered. `The bone wouldn't remain, of course, if I took it -- and the dog wouldn't remain; it would come to bite me -- and I'm sure I shouldn't remain!'

`Then you think nothing would remain?' said the Red Queen.

`I think that's the answer.'

`Wrong, as usual,' said the Red Queen: `the dog's temper would remain.'

`But I don't see how -- '

`Why, look here!' the Red Queen cried. `The dog would lose its temper, wouldn't it?'

`Perhaps it would,' Alice replied cautiously.

`Then if the dog went away, its temper would remain!' the Queen exclaimed triumphantly.

Alice said, as gravely as she could, `They might go different ways.' But she couldn't help thinking to herself, `What dreadful nonsense we ARE talking!'

`She can't do sums a BIT!' the Queens said together, with great emphasis.

`Can YOU do sums?' Alice said, turning suddenly on the White Queen, for she didn't like being found fault with so much.

The Queen gasped and shut her eyes. `I can do Addition,' `if you give me time -- but I can do Subtraction, under ANY circumstances!'

`Of course you know your A B C?' said the Red Queen.

`To be sure I do.' said Alice.

`So do I,' the White Queen whispered: `we'll often say it over together, dear. And I'll tell you a secret -- I can read words of one letter! Isn't THAT grand! However, don't be discouraged. You'll come to it in time.'

Here the Red Queen began again. `Can you answer useful questions?' she said. `How is bread made?'

`I know THAT!' Alice cried eagerly. `You take some flour -- '

`Where do you pick the flower?' the White Queen asked. `In a garden, or in the hedges?'

`Well, it isn't PICKED at all,' Alice explained: `it's GROUND -- '

`How many acres of ground?' said the White Queen. `You mustn't leave out so many things.'

`Fan her head!' the Red Queen anxiously interrupted. `She'll be feverish after so much thinking.' So they set to work and fanned her with bunches of leaves, till she had to beg them to leave off, it blew her hair about so.

`She's all right again now,' said the Red Queen. `Do you know Languages? What's the French for fiddle-de-dee?'

`Fiddle-de-dee's not English,' Alice replied gravely.

`Who ever said it was?' said the Red Queen.

Alice thought she saw a way out of the difficulty this time. `If you'll tell me what language "fiddle-de-dee" is, I'll tell you the French for it!' she exclaimed triumphantly.

But the Red Queen drew herself up rather stiffly, and said `Queens never make bargains.'

`I wish Queens never asked questions,' Alice thought to herself.

`Don't let us quarrel,' the White Queen said in an anxious tone. `What is the cause of lightning?'

`The cause of lightning,' Alice said very decidedly, for she felt quite certain about this, `is the thunder -- no, no!' she hastily corrected herself. `I meant the other way.'

`It's too late to correct it,' said the Red Queen: `when you've once said a thing, that fixes it, and you must take the consequences.'


office,我和某些人對話時, 間中也會出現這類九唔搭八, 雞同鴨講的台詞. 初時我真的懷疑自己是外星人..心想: 難道我說的話很難明嗎 ? .沒理由的..這樣顯淺的道理..


困惑好一段日子, 才醒悟自己實在天真.. 人家出來做事的時候,你才剛出世呢. ...人家怎會不明白..只是有關入士沒有能力解決..又不願說出自己無能為力的事實, 才使出顧左右而言他,問非所答的伎倆, 為自己挽回點點面子吧.


童話的古怪人物還是有善良的一面, 不似現實世界. 有一段是這樣的:


So you did, you know,' the Red Queen said to
Alice. `Always speak the truth -- think before you speak -- and write it down afterwards.'

坦白說, 自己在工作時,曾因直接說出自己的看法, 吃過了不少虧, 被人說類似

憑你這個grade , 幾時輪到你出聲的話.


但我不理了, 反正”I ‘ve got nothing to lose” …只有這樣..我才不覺得不會浪費我的人生..每晚都能安然入睡.

星期六, 1月 28, 2006

歡歡喜喜

港台電視節目首作影畫, 給年青導演機會發表作品, 這才是一個公營廣播機構應做的節目.


第一集, 演藝的畢業生說會介意作品會否出現自己名字..為的不是成名..而是一種尊重. 我很同意.


浸大的畢業生說看片後觀眾大拍手掌,那種感覺他說很難形容”..是的..

.自己也試過這種感覺..是很開心的......


曾有一位拍戲劇節目的導演告訴我..他收過觀眾來信, 讚他拍節目拍得很好? take shot 很有心思……..他除了覺得開心之外. 更覺得電視觀眾真是什麼人也有

有天晚上他在街上閒逛, 當時電視正在播自己導演的劇集的大結局, 整條街的人也在電視機前駐足觀賞, 他說是在這行工作最大的滿足感.


初入行時,我會特地開電視看自己有份做的節目, 雖然看過不知多少次了 ….但當roller出現自己的名字 , 還是會老懷安慰” …心想: 真不枉花了這麼多功夫


說來慚愧..昨天和同事閒聊, 才真正明白香港的電視台計算收視率的方法….一個只得3點的節目,原來也有二十萬觀眾!


收到觀眾的電話, 能給他們提供一些有用的資訊, 我覺得比讚美和批評更值得鼓舞. 因為不論讚美和批評,大都純屬主觀意見..如果沒有實質的理據支持論點, 最好就是不要當真當然說就容易..收到一些近乎無理的批評..還是會火光.


有次看忽然一週..說有觀眾投訴古裝版皆大歡喜的嬰兒角色歡歡和喜喜不連戲.. 專欄媽咪姐週記….說是編導疏忽, 可以唔俾close up 歡歡喜喜

…… 那位作者有否想過兒童 (嬰兒) 演員是受到勞工法例保護, 工作時間有特定限制, 能夠配合拍攝時間參與演出,己屬幸運. 更何況一個n集的單元喜劇, 要求不重要的角色連戲是否不合理呢? 如果唔俾close up..又如何表達BB很開心呢.難道單靠成年人對白和反應嗎? 如果為這些小瑕疵而放棄劇集的表達力, 是否得不償失?真係做娛記..…採訪你就得o...但你地真係未夠料就技術層面去評論電視節目咯

這類似是而非的評論..也是我寫這個blog 推動力

p.s. 預祝 大家來年 每天都

歡歡喜喜!


星期三, 1月 25, 2006

career goal

今天和一個朋友吃飯.

我很欣賞她的..因她是一個很有自己一套的人, 而且還很勇敢 ...

她問我.."你的career goal是什麼?"

約一年多前, 和她一起做事的時候,她也曾問過我這個問題..和現在一樣... 我也是說 "我不知道"

其實我有很concrete 的idea, as long as i stayed in the TV industry.. I know what i want to do exactly.. but I have to confess ... I am not sure whether ......I have the persistence to stay ...

最根本的問題是...我的決心並不如別人所看的堅決...

現在市道並前兩三年好多了..在其他行業工作..薪金定可比現時高.....我也要養家的呀....

在香港的電視台工作......沒有什麼前景.... 但自己的英文及國語又未到人家1st language 程度, 要考進跨國傳媒公司好像很難...

假如自己真的可以在來年正式升職的話..我要再重新訂下目標了..那是什麼呢?.

我不好意思在她面前大言不慚..說自己想怎樣怎樣...
能幹如她, 現在也脫離production, 更不用說我了..

我記得以前看過一篇許鞍華的訪問. 大意是: 她說自己不像其他電影人, 覺得電影是人生唯一目標,入行前,她沒有很大的決心..就算讀法律做律師也可以..

我當時很意外她會這樣說..因為她是一個很優秀的導演....但她的話.頗能反映我現時的心態..只是我不是當律師的材料而已



或者要有這份抽離的理性..才能捱過事業的低潮...堅持下去.

星期一, 1月 23, 2006

Four weddings and a funeral

今天出席了一個喪禮


Four weddings and a funeral….
假如人生快樂事跟不快事的比例是4:1, 那也算十分幸福吧.

隨著年歲漸長..婚禮跟喪禮的比例開始此消彼長..

記得看過一篇訪問, 一位名DJ談他對人生的看法, 大意是: 從前的他很執著.但當他發現在四十歲之後, 參加的喪禮比婚禮多的時候..做人就應該豁達些..


他的說法頗有道理..他是否做到我不清楚因為我不認識從前的他.但能有這個覺悟也很不錯了.


我這個年紀, 剛剛開始接觸婚禮和喪禮還是有點不習慣…..但我想我會慢慢習慣的..不知這是好事還是壞事


...........

看來大家都很不錯嘛 ....

這幾天更覺得自己的不足..

原來當自己做導演的時候 , 也會有些不設實際或吹水不抹咀的想法..

你們提醒了我, 不要步那幫我們經常咒罵/嘲笑的人種後塵..

星期六, 1月 21, 2006

健康大道

這天身子很不妥,懷疑是壓力和勞累所致.


說了很多次要去健身, 說了三年好像也沒付諸行動


兩星期前, 跟同事去打羽毛球, 流流汗後, 雖然因久未運動, 肌肉酸痛,但那幾天精神明顯好多了.


想當年,自己中學時也曾是班裡的sports captain, 如今竟然有了一個大肚腩, 真是慚愧..


我真的要下決心了


大學時?曾經跟一個電影監製吃飯, 他也說, 在這行, 很多人資質差不多, 但有好的身體, 可以在趕工時發揮作用, 較易在時間上勝過別人, 從此分出高下

我不要勝過別人,但我真的需要健康和快樂.

星期四, 1月 19, 2006

又向有線屈服了

最近無線跟亞視的劇集實在看不下去..

還是決定再裝有線....

唉....

今天心情有點不安

因為很多事情要做到的 ...還未辦妥...雖然有不見得全是我的責任...但總是有點緊張...

星期六, 1月 14, 2006

有不少paperwork要做...

這兩天做了很多paperwork...

真慶幸自己大學時在一間不錯的銀行做過intern...

知道paperwork埋葬人的力量

也訓練了自己做paperwork 的耐性...

星期一, 1月 09, 2006

剪髮奇遇記

最近每天忙個不停, 每天回到家中也只有幾個小時睡..
忙得一頭蓬鬆, 今天趁有兩小時空檔, 在觀塘一間商場剪髮..現在有點後悔,但總算"有趣的"經驗.

我才踏入髮型屋, 一個在為客人做負離子的中年女人向我說:"我現在很忙,沒有空, 請你到走廊盡頭的那間鋪吧" . 原來這髮型屋有兩間鋪, 分別在走廊的開始和盡頭, 竟有這樣奇怪眼光的老板.

等了一會, 待我洗頭後 , 替我洗頭的人說 : 對不起,現在我們鋪很多人, 請你走回剛才那一間鋪焗油."

真係咁都得... 我要像"顛婆"經過三四間商鋪, 還好我不是有錢人/ 名人/ 美女, 要不然日後怎樣見人.. 但事情還沒完...

待我焗油之後, 又再跟我說, " 我們的師傅在另一間鋪 ..請你返回剛才那一間鋪"

我並不生氣.. 只覺十分搞笑.. 如是者 又再包著頭巾像元秋在<<功夫>>的造型近返洗頭那間鋪.

師傅的技術一般.. 但反正我的要求也不高...


不過我肯定永遠不會再光顧那間髮型屋的

星期日, 1月 08, 2006

有志者事竟成

When there is a will, there is a way..
有志者事竟成..

最近好像各樣事情都轉好了...

三年前定的目標也算達成了...不用三年三年又三年...最終能否成事, 還有變數,因有些人說話真的可以不算數,但至少肯定自己是有價值的.

回首過去..重要的事件例如入哪一間中學..哪一間大學..哪一個學系..哪一間公司..總是如願的... 儘管那些未必是其他人想要的.但資質一般的我..也應感謝上天...

但我能找到一個我愛而又愛我的人嗎?

星期六, 1月 07, 2006

Thank you

Thanks to those who remember my special day!

星期四, 1月 05, 2006

人生如戲

最近兩天於我和身邊的人發生了很多事.
很多事的timing ,發生次序仿似電視劇.

人生如戲,果然不假.

星期日, 1月 01, 2006